Your kids are finally back in school.
You’ve finished the mounds of paperwork. You are ready to DIG into your business and really rock it.
Until your second grader comes home with lice.
Or the baby is up all night with a cold she caught from your preschooler.
Or there’s a random half day (wait, is that today)?
A few months ago, this Huffington Post article, the default parent, went viral. It has been shared eighty seven thousand times! You know why? Because it is so true for so many of us.
You are the CEO of your business, but let’s face it, you’re probably also the default parent.
You’ll be the one combing through your daughter’s curls with a fine tooth comb, the one rocking the snotty baby in the middle of the night, and taking the afternoon off to accommodate that school holiday. Wait there’s a holiday next week too? And a field trip?
My Mama CEO friends and I have started texting each other with the hashtag #defaultparent
Fun police? #defaultparent
Insurance form filler-outer? #defaultparent
Keeper of the calendar? #defaultparent
Now, don’t get me wrong, the default parent isn’t the better parent. My husband rocks as a dad, is uber supportive of me, and does a ton to keep our family ship moving forward.
But when the other shoe drops….the default parent picks it up.
And I’m not going to lie, being the family’s shock absorber is exhausting and sometimes really aggravating.
When school gets cancelled or the kids get sick, it’s usually on me. Kids need dentist appointments, me. Homework time? Me.
And why am I the only one that knows where that soccer cleat is?
Sometimes I need to stop and remember why I do this.
I want to be available for my kids. I want to go on the field trips (or at least some of them) and volunteer in their class rooms. I want to check in with them when they get out of school and host the playdates at my house.
And I want them to see that I have other things I’m passionate about that I work hard to achieve.
When you are the default parent and trying to build a business, it can feel like Cinderella. You can go to the ball (your business,) but only after you finish all your chores.
And sometimes that’s frustrating.
I’m working on handing off the pieces I can’t handle, because I can’t do it all. I’m getting better at asking for help (even when I don’t feel like I should have to.)
But sometimes, I just want somebody who gets it.
I want to pick the brain of somebody else who’s using Periscope to really build their audience. I want to network with other smart CEOs who are excited about their business. I want to talk to other people who know what it’s like when you’re up holding a puke bucket at 2:30am the day before your biggest webinar.
I’ll continue to be the default parent, the shock absorber and logistical engineer. Getting to be Mama and CEO is worth that blurry line.
As long as I know I’m not alone.
And as long as you know you’re not alone either.
Its just us …and 87,000 others.
ps. This is exactly why I created the Mama Mastermind. To build a place where we can be Mama AND CEO, do them both brilliantly and be there to support each other when we don’t. The doors close on this 4 months group mentorship program tomorrow and we are over ¾ full. I know one of these last few spots is for you. Come join us.
This post is everything. Perfectly said, Megan. #defaultparentsunite
Thanks Jules, its so good to know we are not alone in this Mama CEO world!
#defaultparent this morning when my 4-year old lost the privilege of playing with grandparents this morning based on poor choices last night. You said it beautifully — frustrating but the WHY is the reason that brings it all back into perspective.
We rescheduled grandparent play day for tomorrow and crossing my fingers today is full of good choices!
Yes! Yes! Yes! This is totally my life. The reason it defaults to the Moms is because men have a harder time multi-tasking and drop the ball. Moms are too awesome for that! 😉
This is so right on. It’s great to have these reminders that none of us are alone in this and that there are other moms out there struggling with balance, too.
Yes! Sending #mamalove to all #defaultparent ? This is what I’ve also dubbed the #mamajugglestruggle because sometimes the juggle of mama + CEO can feel like a struggle or as you referenced Cinderalla! Thanks for the reminder ?
So glad you can relate! I love the mama juggle struggle…so true!